I do believe that you effing rats are addicted to opium. My harvest of poppy seeds is a fraction of what it should be because you little junkies keep stealing the pods off the plants before the seeds are even fully ripe. Your rate of theft increases every night and it's not just the premium almost ripe pods that are disappearing, now it's any pod within reach. You've even resorted to gnawing on the dried out empty shells that I've thrown into the compost.
Well, guess what suckers, the party is over. The opium den is shut down. The only pod that you will find tonight will be stuck to the bait end of a rat zapper. If that doesn't get you, then maybe withdrawal symptoms will slow you down enough to make you an easy target for the laziest of predators. I can just see it now, one of you laying in the garden path bleary eyed, shaking and shivering, looking for one more fix... Take one last look, these are the last of the poppy pods and they are MINE.
I don't care if they are ripe or not, they are mine, not yours.
Is there no limit to your destructive habits. Not only do you gnaw on my poppy pods, leaving a mess in the garden like a bunch of drunken frat boys.
Why a bag of raw dried out chicken poop? Were you high on something?
The strawberry is certainly tastier and you didn't even finish it.
Lemon leaves, aromatherapy for the nest, or what? At least you haven't developed a taste for the lemons, yet...
Fern fronds must make a comfy bed for the babies, you certainly can't be eating them.
Chile peppers leaves and stems, hmmmph.
And just because it's Chili Red doesn't mean that a Mini Clubman is something to chew on. And would you mind not leaving your garbage behind
Look, all of you dirty little, big, medium, whatever sized rats, look in here. Come on in, there's some nice snacks in here, step just here...
Heh, heh, heh, heh, heh....